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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! The sporty Simca beat up on the magnificent Humber in our last Choose Your Eternity poll , meaning France gets the PCH Superpower trophy… once it's out of the shop, that is. Today we're going to look at the sort of cars that desperate motivated sellers often refer to as "head turners." You know, it's weird and sort of cool, but also sort of horrible… and wouldn't it be fun to own one? The Basement Lambo was great, but who's got that kind of time? You might not want a Fiero-based Fieroborghini , but how about something in between? Say, this tube-framed, turbo Buick V6-powered Lamborghini Countach replica (go here if the ad disappears), which is priced at a low, low, super-low $8,000! Now, part of the reason this car is so cheap might be that the general pall of loserness cast by the sword-sliced Muncie home invaders (see photo...
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Near as we can tell, this video for the Sonido Lasser Drakar song "82 Pontiac Firebird" shows a wholesome-looking refrigerator-white 3rd-gen Firebird that turns into K.I.T.T. when the sun goes down; meanwhile, the car's driver becomes a werewolf , thirsty for the blood of the Badly Choreographed Cheerleaders. Thanks to Franzouse for the tip!
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Welcome to Down On The Street , where we admire old vehicles found parked on the streets of the Island That Rust Forgot: Alameda, California. I've been looking for a DOTS-worthy Subaru for a long time, but it seems that most of the 70s and 80s examples were crushed long ago. While I'd prefer a BRAT, we'll have to settle for this Justy. First, let's listen to the song I always hear in my head when contemplating a tiny Subaru from the days before mall parking lots were full of the things. Dr. Demento was a big fan of this tune, of course: I've driven a couple of these cars, and "underpowered" doesn't really do that 66-horsepower 3-cylinder justice. In fact, the only post-WW2 vehicle I've ever driven that was slower than the Justy was the VW Rabbit Diesel my high school used for driver training class. But so what? This thing can probably cross several counties on a shotglass of fuel, and it proves that you don't need a Sprint for 3-cylinder 80s action...
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Welcome to Down On The Street , where we admire old vehicles found parked on the streets of the Island That Rust Forgot: Alameda, California. It's Porsche Day today, and we're getting our very first 924. So far we've seen one 356 , a few 912s , a bunch of 911s , some 914s , a couple of 928s , and a pair of 944s (plus a faux Speedster ), so it's about damn time I found one of these. They were still making the 924 in 1988? Yes, the 944 hadn't totally pushed its cheaper sibling aside as the 1980s drew to a close, though 1988 was the very last year for the 924. By this time, the old Audi engine was gone, replaced by the 944's Porsche-made engine (the 944S had a more powerful version of the engine). Still, the '88 924S was a pretty good deal; at $19,900, it was $5,600 cheaper than the base 944, yet had the same 147 horses under the hood. This example seems fairly solid, though there's no telling how far it is from the dreaded timing belt replacement that keeps...
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Yesterday, 68% of voters felt that $129,900 was too much to pay for a 4-year-old lemon-law-buyback Maybach 57, which is doing pretty well according to the harsh standards set by Nice Price Or Crack Pipe. Today we'll be considering a super-low-mileage, near-showroom-condition Dodge Daytona… but we're not talking about the kind of Daytona with the big wing and U-joint-bustin' V8. No, we mean the K-car-based Daytona Turbo Z, which is pretty much the concentrated essence of 1980s style. It's got lots of plastic body parts. It's got the word "Turbo" printed in multiple locations. It's got 142 factory horsepower, and this one's got just 2,021 miles on the clock! That's averages out at fewer than 85 miles per year! The seller has blatantly disregarded eBay car-seller tradition by using correct spelling, grammar, and capitalization, but he or she makes up for it by pointing out the "Star Power" of the car. Worth 25 grand? What do you think? galleryPost...
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This is Down On The Street Bonus Edition , where we check out interesting street-parked cars located in places other than the Island That Rust Forgot . Today we're heading back to Toronto, a city that's given us all manner of interesting old iron in the past, from the Alfa Romeo Giulia Nuova Super 1600 to just about everything else . Twilight Sentinel has found one of the rarest machines of them all, a Gorbachev-grade '87 GAZ Tchaika 14… and it's for sale! Jump away to learn more. galleryPost('DOTSBETorontoGAZ', 3, 'GAZ Tchaika 14 Down On The Toronto Street'); First, we need to get in the right mood to appreciate this fine automobile. A little music, comrades? A while back, I was running errands in Toronto's west end. As I approached a stoplight, I swore I saw the distinct profile of a Russian limousine among the crossing traffic. It was long gone by the time I got there. A week later, I saw it again and collected these shots. OK, so I only have 5 photos...
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newVideoPlayer("/88_Renault5_Spain_494.flv", 506, 423,""); British car buyers felt alive in a Renault 5 , the Germans rocked out in their 5s , but only the Spanish could drive a 5 right into a world of hieroglyphs and ancient Egyptian cassette decks. ¡Comprate un oasis!
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Not all the cars at next month's 24 Hours Of LeMons Arse Freeze-A-Palooza are as gloriously twisted as the CBR900RR-powered Geo Metro or Ghettocharged Frankenmiata , but even a run-of-the-mill Fox Mustang can show up with a great theme . That's exactly what's going on with Team Huey Newis And The Lose , who have painted their '85 Mustang in a painfully 80s pink-and-gray combo and are now assembling team uniforms comprised entirely of Members Only gear. Yes, these guys have a rich cultural vein to mine with their schtick, and you can read their mission statement (and see all the photos) by merely making the jump. galleryPost('LTH08HueyNewisIntro', 6, 'Huey Lewis And The Lose Prepare For Thunderhill Racing Action'); Here is the letter written by the esteemed wordsmith Warren G. Taylor (Ok, his middle initial isn't G. but it should be.) that got us accepted into the race. yes, its both silly and true. To whom it may concern, I have been enlisted, through...
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Nice Price Or Crack Pipe Time is with us once more, following up on the $15,000 '78 Mercury Grand Marquis (which 60% of you felt ought to steam straight to Booth Numbah Two for the crack pipe) with another car for 15 grand. Actually, this '89 420SEL is 15 and a half grand, which is quite an impressive figure… especially after you find out that Kelley thinks it's worth $4,675 in excellent condition. But hey, this car is really, really nice; low miles, looks good, and the owner has "neither smoked nor allowed any pets in the car." What do you think of $15,500 for it? galleryPost('NPOCP89Benz420SEL', 3, '1989 Mercedes Benz 420SEL For Over 15 Grand'); [Craigslist Los Angeles] , Thanks to Commodore356 for the tip! What would you say to $15,500 for an '89 420SEL? ( surveys )
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Yesterday, we saw a 6.9 Benz face defeat for the first time in Project Car Hell history, a feat that generally requires unholy intervention by the Prince Of Darkness himself, or at least the presence of Citroën badges. We've had a run of affordable Hell Projects lately, and that's fine… but sometimes we need to mainline some optimism and look at spending a few more bucks at the gateway to Gearhead Gehenna. We've had some PCH Lambos before, including a Diablo , another Diablo , an Urraco , an Espada , and another Espada. But we've never had the most Lamborghini-ish Lamborghini of them all, the ridiculously awesome Countach . Sure sure, the Countach would get eaten up by a lot of not-quite-supercar factory hot rods these days, but you still need one! The problem is finding one that's an affordable project, which isn't easy… but we've...
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newVideoPlayer("/87_Corolla_FX_494.flv", 506, 423,""); Everyone remembers the FX16 Corolla , but what about the plain ol' economical FX? It was the cheapest Corolla you could get, and the ones sold here were made in California… and it appears that most of them are still on the road today. Sure, that flat hatch looked hideous a little odd, but in an endearing sort of way.
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! It seems that the Japanese won't be celebrating an improbable victory over PCH Superpower Britain this time around, with the Land Rover beating the Nissan Patrol 57% to 43% in our poll . Today we're going to return to a couple of perennial PCH heavy hitters, cars that we all really really want , yet make us stagger back in awe and horror when contemplating the magnitude of the task they represent: the Mercedes-Benz 6.9 and the Jaguar V12! There are ordinary Project Car Hell vehicles, and then there are the heavyweights . The projects that, in the words of the prophet John in Revelations 20:10, will have you "thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever." In fact, the Book Of Revelations is the only shop manual you'll need with a PCH...
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newVideoPlayer("/82_Starlet_JDM_476.flv", 506, 423,""); Those sand rails had better look out, because the Starlet- right off the boat from Japan and sporting JDM fender mirrors and right-hand-drive- now rules the desert! Never mind the fuel-economy thing; it's off-road prowess that gets Starlets off the showroom floor!
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newVideoPlayer("/84_Hyundai_Stellar_494.flv", 506, 423,""); The Hyundai Stellar was quite the mishmash of parts-bin bargains, with the same chassis as the Ford Cortina Mk 5, a Mitsubishi engine, and styling by Giorgetto Giugiaro . That doesn't matter, however; what does matter is that ads for Korean cars have the most awesome combo of macho voiceover and cheezy echo effects in the history of automotive marketing. For another good one, check out the Daewoo Maepsy ad when you're done here.
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Welcome to Down On The Street , where we admire old vehicles found parked on the streets of the Island That Rust Forgot: Alameda, California. I've been neglecting the big BMWs for most of this series, so it's time to follow up the the '86 735i with another E23 from the cocaine-and-S&L-money-mad mid-1980s. Remember the Savings And Loan Crisis? Wild West loans on worthless assets and egregious fraud following in the wake of deregulation of a once-staid sector of the financial system, ultimately costing 160 billion bucks in taxpayer money? Wait, that sounds familiar, except for the bargain price tag… anyway, here's the kind of car that a low-level S&L scamster would have bought with the proceeds of his first "dead horses for dead cows" loan. Now that I'm looking for these cars (and don't worry, 5 Series fans, I'll get some of your cars too), I'm seeing them all over the island. This '84 has seen shinier days, but it still gets its owner...
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