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Though the cars themselves must cost less than $500, the cost of the required safety equipment pushes the build cost of a typical LeMons car well above two grand. That stuff is worth every penny! Here we see the Timmy's Kids '81 Audi 4000 getting into big trouble down Thunderhill's long straight and bashing into the concrete barrier. The driver was totally OK, thanks to his 5-point harness, helmet, and cage (as were the drivers of the Plymouth Belvedere , Yugo GV , and Chevy Cavalier that flipped during the race). Here's the aftermath, courtesy of Mad Science 's camera. Thanks to Patrick of Huey Newis And The Lose for the video!
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Welcome to Down On The Street , where we admire old vehicles found parked on the streets of the Island That Rust Forgot: Alameda, California. Today we've got Exhibit A in the Datsun/Nissan Rebranding Story. It seemed like utter madness when Nissan decided to ditch the Datsun name they'd spent so much to build up, but that's what they did in the early 1980s. At first, they just added an inconspicuous "By Nissan" to their vehicles' emblems, and apparently they figured that, while they were at it, they'd also do a gradual transition for the model name of their big six-cylinder machine. So, for 1981, the full-luxe top-of-the-line 810 was sold in North America as the "810 Maxima." I found this car, with its brake lights in 24/7 "on" mode, parked on the same commercial strip that gave us the 1968 Mercedes-Benz 280SL . It's rough, but it's the first non-junkyard 810 I've seen in years. The 810 Maxima for '81 came with a smaller...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! You want an insane project limo, right? Sure you do! Last time, we had a momentous upset in the Choose Your Eternity poll, with a Detroit car somehow managing to beat two French cars! Granted, no Citroëns were involved, but we're sure there's some weeping and gnashing of teeth in Paris right now. Not like France loses its PCH SuperAwesomeMegaPower rank, of course, but for now that turbocharged Falcon has brought a bit of the pride back to the reeling Motor City (and we're going to have a Detroit-on-Detroit matchup in honor of that accomplishment). Today we're returning to a level of the underworld we haven't visited since the Octo-Door '57 Chrysler took on the Stretch Ferrari 400 : Hell Limousines! Chrysler never built a Hexa-Door Dodge Dart station wagon- which we think was a terrible miscalculation- but when the Vatican demands such...
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The overwhelming majority of voters thought that the Callaway '83 Porsche 944 was reasonably priced at $45,000; not bad for a Late Malaise Era machine. Today we're going to ponder a car from the same era, and it may be even more rare than the Callaway 944: a really straight, all-original Chevy Chevette! I could have sworn that I'd already posted on this car, but I must be mixing it up in my memory with the $20,000 Pinto Squire . That was a full-on rock-smokin' price, but this Chevy is priced far more reasonably: $8,995. Sure, knocking the five bucks off the price to put it under nine grand makes it appear to be on sale at Nickel Nick's Gently Used Brougham Coaches, but the seller was able to take his or her eyes off the 16,700-mile odometer reading long enough to take note of the Chevette emblems on the outside. Just about all the other Chevettes were crushed 15 years ago, and the few that remain are sunk to their axles in trash-strewn lots- this is likely your only...
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You ready for Nice Price Or Crack Pipe today? It's ready for you! Today we've got a really interesting one: the original prototype Gale Banks Buick turbocharged V6 engine- the one that led to the Grand National- installed in a Full Mullet Airbrush Mural Overload '81 Regal… and priced at two hundred grand. That engine, if legit, is certainly worth plenty, but that car somehow doesn't look six-figure-y. What do you think? galleryPost('NPOCPTurboRegal', 6, '200 Grand Prototype Turbo V6 In Airbrushed Regal'); Thanks to Gottsmack for the tip! [Freerevs.com] Is 200 grand too much for an '81 Buick Regal? ( polls )
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Ready for another round of Nice Price Or Crack Pipe? Yesterday, a decisive 89% of you felt that $6,500 was just too much to ask for a Datsun 200SX convertible , so it's off to Booth Number Two for that car! Today we've got something for you fans of vintage Detroit iron- a genuine, coach-built, 1-of-120-built 1981 Ford Fairmont Futura Durango pickups, or, as we like to call such a vehicle: a Fairmontchero! Now, it's no Cyclonechero , particularly in the engine compartment, but it's still a pretty cool cartruck. Question is, nearly 15 grand worth of cool? galleryPost('NPOCPFairmontchero', 6, 'Ford Fairmontchero For Sale'); Thanks once again to that Porcubimmer -drivin' LTDScott for another great tip! [Showdown Muscle Cars] . Is $14,900 complete madness for an '81 Fairmontchero? ( polls )
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newVideoPlayer("/81_BMW315_Germany_494.flv", 506, 423,""); We couldn't get the gas-sipping BMW 315 over here in Nordamerika ; instead, we had to make do with the thirsty 320i version of the E21 platform. Over in Germany, however, the money saved on gas by the 315 facilitated drive-by Quaalude deals between wholesome-looking tennis players… or whatever the hell is going on in this ad. Key swapping?
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A decisive 85% of you felt that the $39,975 Iran Khodro Paykan Deluxe required a major helping of Hubba Rocks to look like a wise investment, but today's choice might be more of a dilemma. Yes, the Cimarron was a total disaster for Cadillac, diluting its brand at the worst possible time, but that makes it a historically significant car… and Pixel has found this super-original, low-mileage example in a used-car dealership with an $8,995 price tag. You might be looking at the best Cimarron on the planet here; check out Pixel's Flickr sets , then make the jump to read his comments on this fine Cadillac compact and vote in the NPOCP poll. galleryPost('NPOCPCimarron', 3, 'Low Mileage Cimarron With Big Price Tag'); I saw this a week or two back at a Worcester MA car dealership and thought it might be right up your alley. It is an near-perfect all-original (less CD player) 1981 Cadillac Cimarron with 10,500(!) original miles. It may be most perfectly preserved example of...
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Welcome to Project Car Hell , where you choose your eternity by selecting the project that's the coolest... and the most hellish! Last time we simultaneously crushed and seared our fingers in the red-hot vise of the Hell Garage, the Shelby-ized Dodge Omni beat hell out of the Shelby-ized Dodge Shadow in the poll. Today, with the New England 24 Hours of LeMons race coming up in just a few days, we're thinking about the kind of car it takes to win the most prestigious trophy of the event. No, that's not the one that goes to the so-called "overall winner" (although a team does get some heavy-duty bragging rights by taking that honor ). We're talking about the coveted Index Of Effluency trophy, the one given to the team that achieves beyond all reasonable expectation in a seemingly hopeless "race car." You contend for the IOE by showing up in a looks-fast-on-paper car that everyone knows is going to blow up for sure (e.g., Maserati Biturbo, Merkur XR4Ti,...
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newVideoPlayer("/Goodwrench_Fuel_Saving_81_476.flv", 506, 423,""); Want to boost the mileage in your '80 Malibu wagon from 11 MPG all the way up to 13 MPG? Mr. Goodwrench has four ways: Air up! Tune Up! Clean Up! Slow Up! Then, next time those pesky Iranians make oil prices go crazy , you'll be ready.
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newVideoPlayer("/81_Maaco_Charo_476.flv", 506, 423,""); When you're talking minor Malaise Era celebrities, you can't do much better than Charo . Maaco decided the ideal ad would start off with Ms. Cuchi-Cuchi providing the intro, then go straight into wooden-faced testimonials from allegedly satisfied customers, including a guy with the classic partly-tinted Serial Killer Eyewear™ look.
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newVideoPlayer("81_Mustang_HotStuff_476.flv", 506, 423,""); When you're a six-foot-tall, 80-pound 1981 babe, the list of things you need for a hot night on the dance floor is pretty short: 1) Cocaine. 2) Absurdly high heels. 3) A Ford Mustang. 4) Cocaine. 5) Cocaine. Ford was eager to provide Item #3, and the 88 HP four-cylinder engine lets you save your money for you-know-what!
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newVideoPlayer("81_Ford_Escort_SS_476.flv", 463, 387,""); It's hard to believe there was ever a time without Ford Escorts in North America, but the '81 was the very first (and, miserable as those early Escorts were, they were much better cars than the Pintos they replaced). The SS was the top-of-the-line Escort for '81, with a whopping 65 horsepower driving the front wheels. Thanks to a short flash of a baseball score (and super-obsessed baseball geeks ), we know this advertisement was aired on May 23, 1981.
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Wouldn't you know it, the 60s BMW coupe beat the 80s one in our last Choose Your Eternity poll . Sure, the 633CSi is more complicated, but you might be able to find a parts car or three in your local wrecking yard... and where's the Hell there? Today we're going to return to the perennial France-versus-the-world battle for the All Time Global Project Car Hell JiggaChampion Trophy (which leaks rusty water and has to be jump-started), and- just because we love an underdog- we're going to let Japan take on the mightiest of PCH Superpowers! We really dig the Dangel 4x4 conversions for the Peugeot 504, and we'd totally drive one... but we Norteamericanos can't get them, thus sparing us the agony joy that is French four-wheelin' action. Or so we thought, prior to Kleinlowe sending us the tip on this Dangel-ized 1981 Peugeot 504 wagon (go here if the ad disappears). As Kleinlowe says "check out the angle of the Dangel," and we have to agree there's something...
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In a stunning upset, the Borgward Hansa wagon handed Germany a one-sided victory over the Peugeot 304 in our most recent Choose Your Eternity poll . With France long reigning as the world's lone HyperGalactic PCH OmniPower, we would be remiss if we didn't give the French a shot at prying the oil-leaking, stripped-fastener-thread PCH CryptoChampion trophy from the Germans, in order to prove that the Borgward's victory wasn't just some one-shot fluke. That's why we're rolling out some Hell Project heavy artillery today, with a pair of undeniably cool- yet just as undeniably nightmarish- machines vying for long-term residency in your Garage Of Torture. It wouldn't be fair to break out the H-bomb of French Hell Projects (the Citröen SM ), because we're fairly certain that nothing on the planet can beat the SM in a Project Car Hell matchup. But how about the Citröen CX ? The early CX has many of the features that made the SM so wonderful and terrible, but with...
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